Wednesday, April 18, 2012

It's Still Important to be Polite- Even if You Are The Bride!

My parents raised me to be polite, and to always say "Please" and "Thank You."  That said, it always surprises me how may people forget these two very meaningful words.  It's not uncommon to hear parents teaching their children to say it, but I've found it is more uncommon for adults to say it to one another.
My Guy and I made sure that as each guest was leaving our engagement party we thanked them for coming- after all, it was a gorgeous afternoon, and the party overlapped the Bruin's playoff game.  Being old fashioned and traditional, I've been busy the last two nights writing out thank you cards to each guest that attended (Side note to anyone that attended the party:  I'd like you to notice that our colors are going to be yellow and blue- matching the dress and shoes I wore that day, and also matching the yellow cards, with blue ink- how's that for branding?!). 
I do this for a couple of reasons.  The first is because I am grateful that people took the time to celebrate with us, and want them to really know it.  The second is because I love to get mail, and it's a rare occasion.  Don't get me wrong, every day I come home to a pile of mail; stacks of bills, ads, coupons, and of course sweepstakes contests... but I'm talking about real mail.  I love a handwritten envelope, and the personal that the card or letter inside supplies.  If you're taught to treat other's how you would like to be treated then this concept should make sense. 
While our society is driven by technology, we sometimes forget to think of others in the traditional (or old fashioned) way.
With Evite and EventBrite we no longer feel the need to send invitations; when we can create an event online and have others RSVP through it.  Having an online guest lists allows others to see who is going, and can give an idea of what to expect. 
FaceBook is nice enough to keep track of our friend's birthdays; so you can comment on their wall or in a message, saving on postage and the price of cards.  Unfortunately, for those that who might be having a birthday, finding hundreds of notifications can be overwhelming, and annoying. 
I've had this conversation with a few people to gather their thoughts about why they dont' send cards (of any kind- birthday, Christmas, Thank You, or otherwise), here is what they offered:   "I'm too busy to write out cards,"  "People don't notice anyway," and "That's a nice idea, but it's not important where I'm from." 
People are busy, I get that.  I'm lucky enough to make my own schedule, and if I need to block out time to thank people for doing something, or making me feel great about myself, then that's what I do.  One of my very good friends has two children (8 and almost 2), she's married, and her hubby works all day.  Her 8 year old is in school, while the toddler stays home and plays all day- she's busy.  Her time off is when she gets a few minutes alone in the shower, which is usually interrupted by some kind of meltdown.  She's busy.  She's raising a family, and being the most admirable, incredible mom I've ever seen.  She was married last October, and has still managed to send out thank you cards to the 150+ people that came together to celebrate her special day.  She stayed up late, and woke up extra early to finish the cards; doing a few at a time.  That's busy.
People do in fact notice.  I can't count how many weddings, showers, engagement, or birthday parties I've been to; but I can tell you who sent a thank you cards.  Cards like that have a way of showing appreciation, and look great hung on the fridge, or on a table- to remind you that you are appreciated.
You might think sending cards is old fashioned, and no one does it where you might be from... I'd like to visit that place and teach those people some manners.  I've lived in DC, spent a few months in Chicago, some time in Colorado, and grown up in New England... I've never met anyone that didn't appreciate basic manners. 
I might be extreme with the Thank You cards- I also send them to vendors that have taken the time to meet with us; I feel like this is important especially if we aren't using that specific person for our wedding. 
There is nothing more important than being polite- especially when you're a Bride.  You're generally speaking, stressed out, overwhelmed, and very busy; but you need to keep in mind that once your big day is over, life goes on-  and if you don't appreciate people leading up to the big event, they might not want to be there afterwards. 
What do you think?  Do you value Thank You cards, or are they old fashioned?

<3 Stacy

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